What’s My Age Again?

Much of my daily tasks of late have me wondering “what’s my age again?” I only wish it were because of immature actions Blink-182 referenced in their song by the same name as this blog post. Instead, I seem to be maturing into something resembling an adult.

Sure, my hair is receding and graying, but it has been for a decade. It certainly didn’t make me change the way I lived my life. I was about as reckless as I’ve ever been pre-pandemic. But the loss of things I took for granted has me questioning the consequentiality of those very things and reinvesting my time elsewhere. What’s my age again? The best example of this is how my use of social media has changed in my old age.

I used to spend hours on Facebook and Twitter, responding to idiots commenting on my many posts. In my youth I enjoyed trolling. I took pleasure in pointing out the holes in people’s arguments. But the rate at which I changed minds wasn’t high enough to warrant the effort exerted. I grew tired in my old age.

Now I use social media almost exclusively on behalf of my work, whether that be my writing or nonprofit endeavors. If I share someone’s Facebook post, it’s probably to one of my many Facebook pages. My blog serves as my status update.

A more relatable example that has me asking myself “what’s my age again” might be this: I bought a new refrigerator today, and I’m pretty jazzed about it. It’s smaller and more efficient, requiring just 322 kWh to operate for a year. I produce ten times that with my solar array over a year.

I wonder what’s more revealing of my advanced age: buying a refrigerator and being jazzed about it, or simply using the word “jazzed” and believing in my bones that it’s super cool. What’s my age again?

I also spend a lot of time working around my home, building retaining walls, pulling weeds, mowing the lawn. I’m finishing half the basement this summer, so the pandemic has been a bit of a blessing. Not only am I writing again, and reading more than ever, but I’m catching up on renovation projects I avoided when I was employed. What’s my age again?

Maybe the best example of my advanced age is my first-ever mortgage that’ll be hanging over my head when my unemployment benefits run out in August. Hopefully by then I’ll be gainfully employed and accepting of my old age. I hear over a quarter of the currently unemployed may remain unemployed perpetually.

I’m 35, going on 55, looking forward to the coed doubles, rec tennis season if COVID-19 allows. I just hope my surgically-repaired back can hold up on the hard courts. What’s my age again?